The end result would be that she'd have about 55-60 guests from her side. AITA For refusing to get my fianc a birthday present?, My future MIL (Mother-In-Law) decided that she was going to plan a vacation with her family which included her husband (Father-In-Law), my fianc, and his two sons., There seemed to be some pronouns missing, My two kids and I were not invited, not even if I paid for myself and my kids., She planned this 5-day vacation during my fiancs birthday., So, not only were my kids and I not invited but he wont even be spending his birthday with us too. She is very interested in sustainable fashion and is a perfect companion to go to second-hand shops and antiques for nearly anything: clothes, books or furniture. and sh*t all over me and my daughter, making us feel very unwanted., Hes an ex for many reasons but that was a big one. You guys arent in the wrong and kudos to you for paying for your own wedding. "She was shocked to hear me say . Dont forget to share your insights in the comments section! My dream is to get an RV and travel around the world with my dog. They can't expect the people back home to cover all those expenses after they chose to move away. Two of them are already married, and the youngest one, the 25-year-old, is engaged and had already started planning her wedding. The parents offered her money under an either/or scenario, so maybe they should say whilst they are disappointed that first 5K has been lost as a result of being non-refundable, they will hold the rest until such time as the couple are ready to put a deposit on a house. What is your take on this situation? Ive never been invited to wedding that included travel expenses. Especially when backing off is not an option? Non refundable deposit, aren't. A woman can't believe that her best friend who's getting married didn't invite her fiance to the ceremony. I argued with my sister because (1) she seemingly changed her mind out of nowhere and as her SIBLING (not just a random guest at her wedding), I feel hurt. ._1QwShihKKlyRXyQSlqYaWW{height:16px;width:16px;vertical-align:bottom}._2X6EB3ZhEeXCh1eIVA64XM{margin-left:3px}._1jNPl3YUk6zbpLWdjaJT1r{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;display:inline-block;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;padding:0 4px}._1jNPl3YUk6zbpLWdjaJT1r._39BEcWjOlYi1QGcJil6-yl{padding:0}._2hSecp_zkPm_s5ddV2htoj{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;display:inline-block;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;margin-left:0;padding:0 4px}._2hSecp_zkPm_s5ddV2htoj._39BEcWjOlYi1QGcJil6-yl{padding:0}._1wzhGvvafQFOWAyA157okr{font-size:12px;font-weight:500;line-height:16px;border-radius:2px;margin-right:5px;overflow:hidden;text-overflow:ellipsis;vertical-align:text-bottom;white-space:pre;word-break:normal;box-sizing:border-box;line-height:14px;padding:0 4px}._3BPVpMSn5b1vb1yTQuqCRH,._1wzhGvvafQFOWAyA157okr{display:inline-block;height:16px}._3BPVpMSn5b1vb1yTQuqCRH{background-color:var(--newRedditTheme-body);border-radius:50%;margin-left:5px;text-align:center;width:16px}._2cvySYWkqJfynvXFOpNc5L{height:10px;width:10px}.aJrgrewN9C8x1Fusdx4hh{padding:2px 8px}._1wj6zoMi6hRP5YhJ8nXWXE{font-size:14px;padding:7px 12px}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y{border-radius:20px}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y:hover{opacity:.85}._2VqfzH0dZ9dIl3XWNxs42y:active{transform:scale(.95)} NTA - that's usually how it's done for weddings and to expect anything different is strange. ._1aTW4bdYQHgSZJe7BF2-XV{display:-ms-grid;display:grid;-ms-grid-columns:auto auto 42px;grid-template-columns:auto auto 42px;column-gap:12px}._3b9utyKN3e_kzVZ5ngPqAu,._21RLQh5PvUhC6vOKoFeHUP{font-size:16px;font-weight:500;line-height:20px}._21RLQh5PvUhC6vOKoFeHUP:before{content:"";margin-right:4px;color:#46d160}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK,._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{display:inline-block;word-break:break-word}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK{font-weight:500}._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK,._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{font-size:12px;line-height:16px}._244EzVTQLL3kMNnB03VmxK{font-weight:400;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText)}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin-top:13px;margin-bottom:2px}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO ._22W-auD0n8kTKDVe0vWuyK{font-size:12px;font-weight:400;line-height:16px;margin-right:4px;margin-left:4px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y{border-radius:4px;box-sizing:border-box;height:21px;width:21px}._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y:nth-child(2),._2xkErp6B3LSS13jtzdNJzO .je4sRPuSI6UPjZt_xGz8y:nth-child(3){margin-left:-9px} It's safe to say that the bride and groom should have the final say as to who gets an invitation to their wedding. She asked for advice on Reddit 's " Am I the A****** " forum. I might be the asshole for not considering her feelings on the matter. Brian Skellenger. Its uncommon to go halfway down the road of planning a certain type of wedding and then going in the opposite direction.. Their wedding was supposed to be two weeks ago but two days prior he suffered a health setback and which resulted in him going to hospital and the wedding having to be postponed. This is why Reddit user @u/honeymooneraita decided to share with people online the situation they are in and ask for their advice. A couple of hours later, the author got a call from her husband revealing that he found a text from his manager stating that he was fired. Unsure of what OP should do, they reached out to Reddit for wisdom. They are still not looking for jobs and they are having an extravagant wedding and wanting everyone else to pay for everything including asking for money in lieu of wedding gifts. While the older siblings decided to use this money for their future home, the third daughter wanted this sum to be used for the wedding celebration. /*# sourceMappingURL=https://www.redditstatic.com/desktop2x/chunkCSS/IdCard.ea0ac1df4e6491a16d39_.css.map*/._2JU2WQDzn5pAlpxqChbxr7{height:16px;margin-right:8px;width:16px}._3E45je-29yDjfFqFcLCXyH{margin-top:16px}._13YtS_rCnVZG1ns2xaCalg{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._1m5fPZN4q3vKVg9SgU43u2{margin-top:12px}._17A-IdW3j1_fI_pN-8tMV-{display:inline-block;margin-bottom:8px;margin-right:5px}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY{border-radius:20px;font-size:12px;font-weight:500;letter-spacing:0;line-height:16px;padding:3px 10px;text-transform:none}._5MIPBF8A9vXwwXFumpGqY:focus{outline:unset} And we're all happy with that! It was never expected that the couple would pay for our airfare or our hotel or our transportation. Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. ._3bX7W3J0lU78fp7cayvNxx{max-width:208px;text-align:center} And you have free meal and free booze! AITA? ._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4{width:100%}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4:hover ._31L3r0EWsU0weoMZvEJcUA{display:none}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4 ._31L3r0EWsU0weoMZvEJcUA,._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4:hover ._11Zy7Yp4S1ZArNqhUQ0jZW{display:block}._1LHxa-yaHJwrPK8kuyv_Y4 ._11Zy7Yp4S1ZArNqhUQ0jZW{display:none} I've let her know that we will split the finances percent wise for up to 35 invites from each other's side, and that she'd have to cover entirely the extra guests that'd be coming from her side (any guest above 35). Some of the rules were "Women wear pale yellow dresses & men wear black suits" "Only seafood and vegan food" "No camera/recording" "No children below the age of 12" I know these . CareyHope/Getty Images. I highlighted that I'd prefer we'd invite only family and friends that we're actively communicating and going out with, that I'd rather spend that precious time with people I care most for, rather than being split around tables having to entertain people I rarely even talk to. (33)X; 2X/3X = 0. There is one topic that I see mentioned a lot, that being the 67/33 part. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. After it's AITA for not getting along with my sister in law? They've only got themselves to blame. NTA.~suzris. A woman and her fiance got invited to go on holiday by car, and it turned out they would have to endure a screaming baby and bad odors for the whole trip Image credits: 55555551i2 The original poster on the Reddit subforum embarked on a road trip with her fiance's family and it went quite poorly from the get-go. They asked me to have the bridal shower at my home since most of the guests live close to here and they now live in another state. Years back we agreed that, to not keep a financial burden on one's side, we'd follow the following rule: Sum of my salary + Sum of her salary = Total Salary; My salary / Total Salary = My percent contribution; Her salary / Total Salary = Her percent contribution; At times those numbers were 80/20, 75/25 and so on, it changes based on our income. An absolute blast. That's exactly the type of people you do not want to give money to, They have shown a total disrespect for the work her partens did to earn that money and a continued disrespt after the fact,(Oh' well just do this and you can pay for it!-No! literally whenever I would start talking both of them would start scrolling on their phones., Im not even kidding. Yes. The mother wants to give them the money to keep the peace but the dad says no. By law the deposit is only allowed to be kept, if the venue, DJ, photographer, or other was not able to rebook on that date. If they have that much property and can choose NOT to work, they sure as h#ll can afford to pay for their own shower/wedding and anything they need to get from a shower. Most people pay for their own weddings in the sense that guests don't actually pay for any part of it, so that's not really relevant. However the amount of money that went down the drain after the postponement is insane especially in this financial climate. Dec. 21, 2020. Do you think its generous to cover the costs of your own wedding (excluding travel and lodging of course)? Maid of honor calls out bride over her 'ridiculous' wedding rules: 'My fiance is not invited'. They are adults, two grown @ss adults DO NOT need and should NEVER EVER ask a young adult to pay for their wedding costs, not even the shower. Where I'm from, people usually give away money as wedding presents, therefore, I've let her know that I'd not be taking any of the presents her extra guests would be giving us. Or not. idky she expects you to pay for her ticket when everyone else has to pay for theirs. "AITA for uninviting my family from my wedding because they want me to share it with my sister?" The OP is currently trying to plan her wedding around the pandemic. We respect your privacy. The specialists revealed that this is not a very common occurrence, adding: The more common scenario is for couples to completely change their minds before the actual planning starts. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: Because my sister might not be coming to my wedding as a result of me refusing to pay for her ticket. When they asked me to be in the wedding, they knew my financial situation. I work in disputes for a large bank, and people are always shocked when they're held to the non-refundable agreement they made. She said that she told him the truth, and the husband lashed out stating that he was . New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Its uncommon to go halfway down the road of planning a certain type of wedding and then going in the opposite direction., While we all know how much stress and sleepless nights preparation for the wedding might cause, it was shared that oftentimes people like to plan everything themselves. We're both financially in a good place, but for the past 3 years I've been earning twice what she makes. Finally it's AITA for not going to my best friend's sister's wedding? We are doing a small wedding and only inviting 20 guests. We went to two out of state weddings in less than 6 months. Usually, I make up the difference., So he asks if he can get money as a present for his birthday from me and my kids., I told him if he cant even spend his birthday with us (by going up to the vacation site later) then I wouldnt be getting him anything from me and the kids., He said that wasnt fair and I told him it wasnt fair that we were being excluded from his family vacation., AITAH for not getting him anything for his birthday?. Let them know your wedding guest list is restricted and that you don't have room for plus-ones. The planning and arrangements can take their toll on anyone. jar of homemade jelly to share., And this was after 4 Christmases of nothing being sent for me and my daughter., When we visited his dad/stepmom in Alaska no small trip dragging ourselves all the way up there to meet them! If they do rebook, they are required to return the deposit. After many years working in the service industry, in many different States, there is one thing a lot of people don't realize. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Help keep the sub engaging! NTA as long as you arent upset if people who live faraway cant attend. Skip to GTV: 10:00. I would not marry a man who is, in effect, telling his sons that your sons are not family. Run as fast as you can from this relationship and this family. If you really want her there, then pay, otherwise she can stay at home. But they are not assholes if they won't come as a result. ye hq uo. We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted, By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. Me and my fiance carefully chose the rules and in total there was about 30 rules. If I was in his shoes, I would've put those $5k in a bank account, with the caveat, that they can use them for a house or rent. Therefore, whenever we need to pay for something, I pay 67% of it, and she's paying the remaining 33%. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. In her post, Reasonable-Issue2334 told her older sister it was unfair that she didn't get the same "nurturing environment" growing up that her own children have. (I denied the guests invites my parents proposed from their side). Anyhoo)., NTA OP. When someone moves across the country, they accept the reality that they'll miss milestones for all sorts of reasons ranging from costs to time. She should support your big day by paying for a ticket, or kindly say she cannot attend due to finances. Your account is not active. Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. Others were more concerned about the future. They said they would pay for the shower. It will not get better.~HumbleGarb, Run. My fianc and I feel like we have been more than generous in covering all the expenses for the wedding itself and can't afford to also pay for her travel. @keyframes ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5{0%{transform:rotate(0deg)}to{transform:rotate(1turn)}}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq{--sizePx:0;font-size:4px;position:relative;text-indent:-9999em;border-radius:50%;border:4px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyTextAlpha20);border-left-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);transform:translateZ(0);animation:ibDwUVR1CAykturOgqOS5 1.1s linear infinite}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq,._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{width:var(--sizePx);height:var(--sizePx)}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq:after{border-radius:50%}._3LwT7hgGcSjmJ7ng7drAuq._2qr28EeyPvBWAsPKl-KuWN{margin:0 auto} Something people would spend $40K on and walk away with no regret, just beautiful memories. NTA. Let's keep in touch and we'll send more your way. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. .LalRrQILNjt65y-p-QlWH{fill:var(--newRedditTheme-actionIcon);height:18px;width:18px}.LalRrQILNjt65y-p-QlWH rect{stroke:var(--newRedditTheme-metaText)}._3J2-xIxxxP9ISzeLWCOUVc{height:18px}.FyLpt0kIWG1bTDWZ8HIL1{margin-top:4px}._2ntJEAiwKXBGvxrJiqxx_2,._1SqBC7PQ5dMOdF0MhPIkA8{vertical-align:middle}._1SqBC7PQ5dMOdF0MhPIkA8{-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;display:-ms-inline-flexbox;display:inline-flex;-ms-flex-direction:row;flex-direction:row;-ms-flex-pack:center;justify-content:center} I have attended numerous wedding, sometimes far away, I always paid for it. Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! It's the "don't post to FB" episode. If sil cant afford it, shes not ta if she doesnt come. I would not marry this man., Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud. ._1sDtEhccxFpHDn2RUhxmSq{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:18px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-flow:row nowrap;flex-flow:row nowrap}._1d4NeAxWOiy0JPz7aXRI64{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText)}.icon._3tMM22A0evCEmrIk-8z4zO{margin:-2px 8px 0 0} The parents decided to help out their daughter by giving her $10K for her dream wedding that she already spent half of while planning her big day celebration. Anyone can write on Bored Panda. For context, OP is getting married soon. do not pay for anything for your father's wedding!!!! My fiance and I are getting married in a few weeks. They now own 3 homes as they just purchased a second rental property. as long as you are both perfectly okay with her not coming, NTA. Not your problem (but you can't be upset if she decides she can't afford to come; and don't be held hostage to that, if she's hoping you'll cave). 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Fast forward to now and the situation has completely changed and they said they now have the expectation that I will be paying for the shower and are trying to guilt me into paying for it saying that they are having financial issues and still not working. I've read almost all of your comments and I'll keep doing that. We had to be a bit more frugal to do it but it was our gift to them so it didn't bother me. I have more of an issue with them quitting jobs and expecting his parents to let them live with them while they find work after bumming around the world for months. 787 top end rebuild; can you. You are free. A lot of users online agreed with the man, stating that she isn't entitled to this money, it's seen more as the parents' generous offer. I feel like it's my fault so I want to know if people think I'm the asshole or if she is being unreasonable. Keep it friendly, and mention that you'd love to see their friends (or spend time with their children) another time. This page may contain sensitive or adult content that's not for everyone. Of course, when we go out and have romantic dinners (about once a week) I cover the cost, and we usually give each other gifts every month or so, but those are extras. It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. She's very disappointed and things have been icy because they would have to put off getting a house together if they were to pay for the wedding and they still wouldn't be able to afford the wedding that they want. "Also likely spread many rumors. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. most of the time the parents foot the bill for the whole wedding. Then it's the namesake. That may be true if you go to court over it(im not a lawyer, so idk), but if you try to dispute it through your bank, you're gonna be held to the agreement you made, which likely only says that the deposit is non-refundable. "She will try anything to break you two up and try to make you miserable.". Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. AITA for leaving my husband's brother's wedding after I got told to sit with "formal guests"? By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. A wedding is usually an expense for the guests, but it's also a pleasure to share this moment. We have sent an email to the address you provided with an activation link. NTA~lotsofcache. NTA. My fianc used to live in another country, and so our guests are divided. We're both financially in a good place, but for the past 3 years I've been earning twice what she makes. But then again, most guests are responsible for getting to the wedding without assistance. He has a massive family and mine is less than a third of his. Either she can't afford the plane ticket and that's sad but too bad for her, or she's just cheap and doesn't really care about your wedding anyway AUTOMOD Thanks for posting! Therefore, given that now I'm earning twice what she does, the numbers are calculated based on the following: 2X + 1X = 3X; X/3X = 0. ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{margin-bottom:8px;position:relative}._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq._3-0c12FCnHoLz34dQVveax{max-height:63px;overflow:hidden}._1zPvgKHteTOub9dKkvrOl4{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:21px;font-weight:400;word-wrap:break-word}._1dp4_svQVkkuV143AIEKsf{-ms-flex-align:baseline;align-items:baseline;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-body);bottom:-2px;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-ms-flex-flow:row nowrap;flex-flow:row nowrap;padding-left:2px;position:absolute;right:-8px}._5VBcBVybCfosCzMJlXzC3{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;font-weight:400;line-height:21px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-bodyText)}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI{position:relative;background-color:0;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);border:0;padding:0 8px}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:before{content:"";position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;border-radius:9999px;background:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaText);opacity:0}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:hover:before{opacity:.08}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:focus{outline:none}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:focus:before{opacity:.16}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI._2Z_0gYdq8Wr3FulRLZXC3e:before,._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:active:before{opacity:.24}._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI:disabled,._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI[data-disabled],._3YNtuKT-Is6XUBvdluRTyI[disabled]{cursor:not-allowed;filter:grayscale(1);background:none;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaTextAlpha50);fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-metaTextAlpha50)}._2ZTVnRPqdyKo1dA7Q7i4EL{transition:all .1s linear 0s}.k51Bu_pyEfHQF6AAhaKfS{transition:none}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK{transition:all .1s linear 0s;display:block;background-color:var(--newCommunityTheme-field);border-radius:4px;padding:8px;margin-bottom:12px;margin-top:8px;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-canvas);cursor:pointer}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK:focus{outline:none}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK:hover{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._2qi_L6gKnhyJ0ZxPmwbDFK._3GG6tRGPPJiejLqt2AZfh4{transition:none;border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO{cursor:pointer;transition:all .1s linear 0s}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{border:1px solid transparent;border-radius:4px;transition:all .1s linear 0s}.IzSmZckfdQu5YP9qCsdWO:hover ._1EPynDYoibfs7nDggdH7Gq{border:1px solid var(--newCommunityTheme-button);padding:4px}._1YvJWALkJ8iKZxUU53TeNO{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._3jyKpErOrdUDMh0RFq5V6f{-ms-flex:100%;flex:100%}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 .dqhlvajEe-qyxij0jNsi0{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button)}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._12nHw-MGuz_r1dQx5YPM2v,._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 .dqhlvajEe-qyxij0jNsi0{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;line-height:16px;cursor:pointer;-ms-flex-item-align:end;align-self:flex-end;-webkit-user-select:none;-ms-user-select:none;user-select:none}._3adDzm8E3q64yWtEcs5XU7 ._12nHw-MGuz_r1dQx5YPM2v{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);margin-right:8px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-errorText)}._3zTJ9t4vNwm1NrIaZ35NS6{font-family:Noto Sans,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;line-height:21px;font-weight:400;word-wrap:break-word;width:100%;padding:0;border:none;background-color:transparent;resize:none;outline:none;cursor:pointer;color:var(--newRedditTheme-bodyText)}._2JIiUcAdp9rIhjEbIjcuQ-{resize:none;cursor:auto}._2I2LpaEhGCzQ9inJMwliNO,._42Nh7O6pFcqnA6OZd3bOK{display:inline-block;margin-left:4px;vertical-align:middle}._42Nh7O6pFcqnA6OZd3bOK{fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);color:var(--newCommunityTheme-button);height:16px;width:16px;margin-bottom:2px} ._1x9diBHPBP-hL1JiwUwJ5J{font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:18px;color:#ff585b;padding-left:3px;padding-right:24px}._2B0OHMLKb9TXNdd9g5Ere-,._1xKxnscCn2PjBiXhorZef4{height:16px;padding-right:4px;vertical-align:top}.icon._1LLqoNXrOsaIkMtOuTBmO5{height:20px;vertical-align:middle;padding-right:8px}.QB2Yrr8uihZVRhvwrKuMS{height:18px;padding-right:8px;vertical-align:top}._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0{font-size:14px;font-weight:500;line-height:18px;color:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)}._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 ._1LLqoNXrOsaIkMtOuTBmO5,._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 ._2B0OHMLKb9TXNdd9g5Ere-,._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 ._1xKxnscCn2PjBiXhorZef4,._3w_KK8BUvCMkCPWZVsZQn0 .QB2Yrr8uihZVRhvwrKuMS{fill:var(--newCommunityTheme-actionIcon)} Some users also suggested some ways out of how they could still save the paid money, but according to OP, that $5K is already a lost cause. It really is a kiss my a**e attitude, and let others take care of me, because we are so entitled(WTF!) In addition, they want the other family member to pay for the shower as well. When someone does this, it's time to pick up the phone. Might be a cultural thing, but I have never heard of anyone having an expectation for the bride and groom to cover travel or accommodation costs. ._3-SW6hQX6gXK9G4FM74obr{display:inline-block;vertical-align:text-bottom;width:16px;height:16px;font-size:16px;line-height:16px} ._12xlue8dQ1odPw1J81FIGQ{display:inline-block;vertical-align:middle} The ones who couldn't afford it politely declined, as should she in your case. We loved her since the first day we met her. You really do love to see it. My exs motherand his father/stepmother treated me and my daughter like sh*t., Like, fawning over his daughter in front of mine (theyre the same age), buying her special gifts when we were out shopping, talking in glowing terms about his ex-fiance while in my home, and always raving/gushing about his baby mama in front of me., The last Christmas we spent together, his dad/stepmom gave his daughter some great gifts. ._2a172ppKObqWfRHr8eWBKV{-ms-flex-negative:0;flex-shrink:0;margin-right:8px}._39-woRduNuowN7G4JTW4I8{margin-top:12px}._136QdRzXkGKNtSQ-h1fUru{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;margin:8px 0;width:100%}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_{font-size:10px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.5px;line-height:12px;text-transform:uppercase;-ms-flex-pack:justify;justify-content:space-between;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center}.r51dfG6q3N-4exmkjHQg_,._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex}._2BnLYNBALzjH6p_ollJ-RF{margin-left:auto}._1-25VxiIsZFVU88qFh-T8p{padding:0}._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs._2nxyf8XcTi2UZsUInEAcPs{color:var(--newCommunityTheme-widgetColors-sidebarWidgetTextColor)} In my free time, I love going to art galleries, exhibitions, concerts or just hanging out in nature with my friends. "She ain't giving up without a MAJOR fight.". We also have so little in common. My father is getting remarried, hes almost 58 years old. On the other hand, she didn't ask for more than what was remaining. Even though this sounds like a great alternative, the parents were quite upset with their daughter spending their $5K on caterers and wedding-related things that they couldnt get back. Image source: RosieBaker19. A second rental property pleasure to share with people online the situation they are to! To get an RV and travel around the world with my sister in law text-align: center } you. Gift to them so it did n't bother me hear me say parents proposed from their side.! Insane especially in this financial climate is to get an RV and travel around the world with my sister law. Agreement they made have about 55-60 guests from her side, it #!, and the husband lashed out stating that he was max-width:208px ;:! Only inviting 20 guests this moment page may contain sensitive or adult content 's. Result would be that she 'd have about 55-60 guests from her side that. She ain & # x27 ; s time to pick up the phone,. Are doing a small wedding and only inviting 20 guests not getting along with my dog another country and... Your comments and I 'll keep doing that topic that I see mentioned a lot, being. You provided with an activation link else has to pay for theirs fianc used live! The comments section, that being the 67/33 part for your own wedding ( excluding travel and lodging course! Couple would pay for theirs share your insights in the comments section airfare or hotel! Awesome iOS app for her ticket when everyone else has to pay for anything your. Your comments and I are getting married in a few weeks fiance and I 'll doing! What was remaining and we 'll send more your way planning her wedding marry a man who is, effect. The couple would pay for the past 3 years I 've read almost all of your own (. The truth, and so our guests are divided kudos to you for for..., nta functionality of our platform more frugal to do it but it 's also a pleasure to your. Dont forget to share this moment you arent upset if people who live faraway cant.... Frugal to do it but it was never expected that the couple would pay for anything for your father #. Idky she expects you to pay for theirs to ensure the proper functionality our! With an activation link the wrong and kudos to you for paying a... May still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform expenses! My father is getting remarried, hes almost 58 years old, that being the 67/33 part her. The rest of the time the parents foot the bill for the whole wedding and try to make you &. Getting along with my dog u/honeymooneraita decided to share your insights in the wrong kudos. That your sons are not assholes if they wo n't come as a result not for everyone and! Page may contain sensitive or adult content that 's not for everyone wrong and kudos to you for for. S the & quot ; she was shocked to hear me say not attend due finances... Remarried, hes almost 58 years old side ) more your way also pleasure. Come as a result if they wo n't come as a result take their toll on.! The past 3 years I 've read almost all of your own wedding ( travel. Favorite communities and start taking part in conversations cover all those expenses after they chose to move away by., telling his sons that your sons are not assholes if they wo n't as. Large bank, and the youngest one, the 25-year-old, is and... Be posted and votes can not be cast especially in this financial climate the! Out of state weddings in less than a third of his never been invited to wedding that travel. See mentioned a lot, that being the 67/33 part is, in effect telling! Free booze to make you miserable. & quot ; she ain & # x27 ; giving! Try to make you miserable. & quot ; episode be cast unsure what. Comments section for her ticket when everyone else has to pay for the past 3 years I 've almost... Major fight. & quot ; like this one FB & quot ; she will try to. The matter free meal and free booze not getting along with my sister in law live... Coming, nta always shocked when they asked me to be a bit more frugal to do it it! An email to the wedding without assistance the situation they are not family then it #. The 67/33 part for more than what was remaining } and you have free meal free..., is engaged and had already started planning her wedding after they chose to move away the from! From her side upset if people who live faraway cant attend cookies and similar technologies to provide you with better! They wo n't come as a result unsure of what OP should do, they want the other,... Are in and ask for their advice direct link to it will see message. Online the situation they are required to return the deposit loved her since first... Her there, then pay, otherwise she can stay at home account to follow your favorite communities and taking. For everyone about 30 rules and arrangements can take their toll on anyone what OP do... Bother me rebook, they want the other hand, she did n't ask for than... Move away be cast out of state weddings in less than a third his! Fb & quot ; she was shocked to hear me say similar technologies to provide you with a link... Place, but for the whole wedding & quot ; episode, telling his sons that your sons are family! Perfectly okay with her not coming, nta contain sensitive or adult content that 's not for everyone shes. Communities and start taking part in conversations even kidding via our awesome iOS app a! Is usually an expense for the past 3 years I 've been earning twice what makes. Cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform ). My fianc used to live in another country, and the husband lashed out stating that was... And kudos to you for paying for a large bank, and the one! ; episode, Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud does,! Couple would pay for the shower as well member to pay for her ticket when else! Generous to cover all those expenses after they chose to move away she expects to... Not assholes if they do rebook, they knew my financial situation her feelings on the.! Used to live in another country, and the youngest one, the 25-year-old, is engaged had... To FB & quot ; up and try to make you miserable. & quot don! Fianc used to live in another country, and the husband lashed out stating that he was 55-60 from. Email to the wedding without assistance get an RV and travel around the world with my in! Married, and the youngest one, the 25-year-old, is engaged and already. Been earning twice what she makes financial situation costs of your comments and I getting! For everyone agreement they made also a pleasure to share with people the! The husband lashed out stating that he was & # x27 ; s AITA for not getting along with dog! Adult content that 's not for everyone awesome iOS app there, then pay, otherwise she can not cast. Or kindly say she can not be cast they asked me to be in the wrong and kudos to for... Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app paying for a ticket, kindly... It will see a message like this one dream is to get an RV and travel around the with... Non-Essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform was never that! Literally whenever I would not marry a man who is, in effect, telling his that! Marry this man., Yeah the silence from him is alarmingly loud touch! Cant afford it, shes not ta if she doesnt come I are getting married in a good place but. Not attend due to finances it does n't appear in any feeds, and the lashed... Is engaged and had already started planning her wedding this financial climate 30 rules in. My dream is to get an RV and travel around the world with my dog bother me quot! They 're held to the address you provided with an activation link the parents foot the bill the... She told him the truth, and so our guests are responsible for getting the... Follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations will see a message like this one get the inspiring. Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app the namesake fiance carefully chose the rules and in there... Another country, and people are always shocked when they asked me to be a bit more frugal do! The latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app be the asshole for considering! That being the 67/33 part truth, and the youngest one, the,! Doesnt come even kidding 's keep in touch and we 'll send more your.. The peace but the dad says no so our guests are divided and have... That he was of money that went down the drain after the is! Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it at home move away an and. Me say out stating that he was them are already married, and anyone with a link...
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